Q: I’m interested in bringing another person into our bedroom. Me and my partner have been together for 17 years and I’ve grown so used to my spouse that at times it gets a little boring. The same positions, the same sounds, the same outfits. I’m at a point where I want more and as I see more of my family passing away due to age and illness, I’m ready to explore a more poly lifestyle. How should I tell my partner?
Sincerely,
Spicing it Up
A: Before you bring someone else into ya’ll mess, make sure your partner is satisfied. I can’t tell from the question if you are a man or woman, gay or straight, but my advice to all of ya is that don’t bring someone else into your business unless your partner is crazy about the things you do in bed. Because it takes two, so if you say your partner is boring. You are probably a little boring too. If you can’t make the first partner happy, how you finna make the next one happy? And to me, it just sounds like you wanna do a little cheating. You have grown old with your current partner that means you should feel comfortable asking for what you want. Pull out the toys, sex swing, blow up dolls, whatever you’re into, but don’t bring no one into your bedroom until the first one is satisfied. You are setting yourself up for a poly-disaster.
I said don’t do it.
–Annie
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